And with one fall, everything has changed…
For the last 10 years I have been like a parent to my parents. It’s a very hard place to be as you see them age, yet become like children again. The line of dignity is hard to find, and sometimes necessitates crossing.
The very thing I have warned, reminded, and irritated my mom and dad about happened a couple of weeks ago.
She fell.
Broken hip.
Surgery.
Effects of anesthesia enhanced her dementia.
Rehab facility, long recovery.
Dependent husband joins her in need for more care.
And everything has changed.
God allowed it all. It’s their story, I couldn’t control.
Now, my heart sorrows over it. I lose sleep thinking of their new normal. I can’t control it, I can’t rescue them from this season. It’s their story to walk thru.
My heart guilts over them. As I drove Dad to join Mom in his new confused normal, it was like taking your beloved dog to be put down. Silence, near tears, just trying to be thankful for a good place that will give them the new level of care they both need. It’s their story to walk thru.
Lord, will you be there to reassure him? I can only pray God that you are there with them, carrying them, showing yourself faithful each moment. Comfort them Holy Spirit, and comfort me.
Just as they had to let go of each of their five children to live their story, I must let go and trust you are ALWAYS good, You SEE them, You LOVE them, and I can TRUST you.
So my tears are my offering to you Lord as I move on past my sorrow, guilt and yield my control to your mighty hand. Lord, I believe Your story is for their good, and Your glory… remind me of this daily.
ShowMeAgain Lord- @KristiBarefoot 
Your wisdom is inspiring to me. Your heart is so I tune with the Father. Thank you for sharing.
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My heart hurts for you Kristi. You penned it perfectly. It’s such a hard path to walk and the daughter-guilt is so real. You WILL get through this as you keep your eyes on Jesus!!
Prayers 🙏🏻
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Thank you Linda –
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I’m so sorry Kristi! I had to through this with my mom. It’s never easy but you can rest assured they are being taken care of and that God is with them and you! Miss you my friend❣️😘
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Thank you Dear Friend
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Oh Kristi, how my heart hurts for your tender, loving, hurting heart. I have walked this path with my parents and in-laws ~ and it is hard. BUT GOD ~ was faithful and I know with certainty my Mothers both accepted Jesus as their Lord and I am trusting my Fathers heard our words of hope before their passing and accepted Jesus into their hearts. With what they walked thru they were put in a position to listen and hear the truth of the Gospel … we praise Him for walking alongside us, their children, and being our parents ever present loving Father during those years ❤️
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Thank you Jodi
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It’s been 4 weeks since my mom passed. We both contracted COVID, but Mom was hospitalized due to the inability to care for herself, and I was too sick to do take on that job. Then two days later, she was transferred to the care facility for rehab. The following day, she suffered a massive stroke and was unresponsive, with total left side paralysis. On Monday, she was placed on hospice and died six days later without waking up from her coma. I had to deal with this all on my own while having to use oxygen for the COVID pneumonia. But I knew that I wasn’t totally alone, because Jesus was right there with me. I may be alone in life, but God is in control, and good things have occurred during this season. He knows what’s best for your parents and for you. God’s got this, and so do you. My prayers are with you.
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I saw all you went thru via FB – so glad you have your other sweet family to bring you comfort
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My prayers are with you Kris. I know it’s a heartache to have to do that. I thought alot of your parents but, I haven’t seen them in years. I know God can see you and knows what you are going through. May His mercy and grace be with you.
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Thanks Artie – your family meant so much to us – the beginning of our Journey of Faith…love you
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Kristi I can so relate to your story. My Mom died three years ago. Nine months later my Dad fell and moved in with us for two and a half years. End of March he fell and broke his hip after moving into a board an care home three days earlier! Dementia had hit and I couldn’t care for Holman at home any longer. Such a difficult journey to walk through. You put into words exactly how I feel. The comfort is knowing that the Lord is holding them even now until He takes them to glory. Love and prayers for you as we walk this road 💖
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Thanks Carol – you’ve lived it…like so many. Blessings
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It most definitely is a very difficult time in one’s life. As I reflect back to my parents as they aged I was a complete mess. The only thing I can tell you is that God was there for me. I also believe that in the process and also watching my parents story, it showed me how I wanted things to be as I aged. It helped me to educate my boys so that they knew way ahead of time what my desires were for myself when I become too old to take care of myself. Praying for you as you deal with this. Seek the little lessons that God is showing you.
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Thank you for your prayers Gail
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Kristi, I grieve with you since I am in the position. After caring for Monte’s mom for many years, she passed a couple years ago while in a nursing home. Now, we’ve had my mom for the last 6 years. My mom’s health, though over all can be good tends to get dehydrated because she sleeps most of the day and doesn’t drink. She had 2 hospital stays in the last 2 weeks. When dehydrated, she is also disoriented and hard to reason with. I am doing all I can not to put her in a facility, but some days I wonder if it’s best.
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Thank you dear friend…
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You are fortunate to have them for so many years my mom passed when I was 29, so much of her life with me and my children I have missed. My daughter was only 9 and my son 6. My son only knows her from pictures in our home because she was so sick and I nursing homes most of his life.
I know this doesn’t make it hurt any less for you but just wanted you to remember, you had them longer than some others.
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Kristi, I know your pain and sorrow. It’s just about the hardest thing to deal with as our parents age. God will carry you and your parents❤️
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Thank you Dreama!
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